Sometimes I Wish I Could Fall Into a Well

08:14 pm - where is the love?

I went to Urban Outfitters today after stealing $80 from my stupid little sister. I bought two really cool track jackets. One is bright blue with a red stripe down the sleeves, the other is green with a yellow one. I bought them because i figured they looked vintage enough to be passed off as emo. Afterwards i went to my opticians office, he said i still don't need glasses, so i lied and got a prescription anyway so i can wear big black chunky ones.
My damn little sister somehow found this site so i told her I'd kill her in her sleep if she showed it to mom.
anyways, its 8:30 and i'm thinking about going to watch next top model because those girls cry a lot and i feel that i can relate. i have gone thru 12 of the big kleenex boxes this week. i'm all dried out.

i saw a hot boy today. i asked him for his number and he called me a dyke. *tear* but on the upside i think i might go on a date with his ugly friend.
-jewel

05:17 pm - wilting flower

so there are a couple people over at julias...those guys from water ballet. they keep making references to losers and people who have no friends. julia keeps laughing but we both took a bike ride to the park to listen to some emo music and get away from them for a while and she told me shes really sad. not because the girls are making fun of us...we both know they are, but because they played life is so sad on the radio and we were so upset cause preps probably heard it. theyll be singing that song tomorrow in school or maybe some prep will have it on a cd in the locker room and theyll all be singing and laughing at my folded pants and making fun of my emo sound effect "maah" and "baagr".
i got new gloves today. i cut off the tips of the fingers cause i wanted to be able to play my air guitar. speaking of my air guitar, my mom says im getting really good at it. i thought i needed a lot more practice to be like the pros...better go work on that...

poem of the day:

the snow is melting
much like my life
dogwood trees stand tall
much like my brother
he doesnt talk to me anymore
why did you have to die?

12:55 pm - everybody hates me

hey guys....i realized that julias the only one who gets comments...i dont know why this is....i guess im not interesting maybe? except i think i really am. i was listening to some dashboard this morning...i'm in such a great mood now. better go cry.

Current Mood: cheerful

08:45 pm - what your mother didnt tell you

i tried out for spring water ballet today and I met a bunch of really nice girls! their names were ashley jessica missy and tara and they totally said i could hang out with them during the next full moon because they wanted to see what would happen, i dont know what that means fer sher, but they laughed a lot so I guess it's cool people slang. I didn't make the team, probably because I can't swim. thats ok since i obviously have a lot of new friends. I know it is totally pathetic that i care what the abercrombie kids think of me because i'm so tired of highschool and blonde people, but they are always so happy and i am sad.

Mood: optimistic ;)
DL this song: constantine-something corporate
Thought: I hate capitalism
Wearing: leg warmers, my lime green hot pants and two different shoes

-jew

random song lyric:
When I look in your eyes
I can feel the butterflies

07:52 pm - you always say goodnight

you always say goodbye, goodnight....i know you love me...i know it cause you told me so many years ago. im so sick of lies!!! dont promise me you'll love me forever if you won't! i wrote you this poem the other day...

There's not a minute that doesn't matter,
Not a moment can be lost,
Not a memory can be erased,
Or the hour at it's cost.
Not a fallen leaf will re-attach,
Nor a wilted rose will bloom,
Not a blind man ever be inspired
By the irredescent moon.
But a broken man can be repaired,
And a severed heart can mend,
And the villian who has no remorse
Could one day make a friend.

There's not a minute that doesn't matter,
Not a spoken word dismissed,
Not a single soul is perfect,
Nor every sin can a soul resist.
Not a tear falls without meaning,
Not a death can be restored,
Not a torment ever be forgotten,
Or the skin through which it tore.
But a victim can regain their courage,
And an open wound can heal,
And a man can penetrate a hard heart,
And teach it how to feel.

There's not a minute that doesn't matter,
Not a helpful hand gone to waste,
Not a person can escape misfortune,
Or avoid it's bitter taste.
Not an opinion can be declared fact,
Nor a feeling set in stone,
Not a person is more solitude,
Then a man who walks alone.
But a vacant stomach can be replenished,
And a lifeless spirit can rise up like a dove,
But the damage over time can only be renovated,
By a man who offers love.


-hew

ps: today was the beginning of spring sports. i tried out for spring track but apparently you have to run a lot to be accepted, so they rejected me. why?! is running even what sports are about?! or was i just kicked out cause i'm not one of the jock kids? white supremacy at our school upsets me....later guys....

Current Mood: crappy

07:39 pm

hey i dont know why jules picked these colors. they remind me of this doll i used to have when i was 3. my sister took it away from me that year. i still cry about that shit, but i try not to let it phaze me. phaze me? man....i cant even believe i said that. i feel like i'm trying to be gangster. i just want everyone to know that i'm not and people who are really upset me.
man i got this pencil today and the sharpener took more than half of it away from me....just like everything else that's taken away from me. my life is so sad...i can't take this. :'( see ya guys...

-hew

....i can fly on mondays...im only skin and bones...

07:25 pm - princess on the steeple and all the pretty people

Today I made this live journal. It was an emotional time period for me because I had forgotten to buy the right kind of ice cream at the store and I just wanted to cry when I got home. *tear*

But I am so done with that. Finito Fa Real.

Also I found out that my favorite band Thanks4Nothing was breaking up which broke my heart as they have been my favorite band for 3 consecutive weeks.

I started using this live journal because my stupid little sister kept breaking the lock on my princess jasmine diary and i got tired of beating her ass. El-Oh-El

my friend hew walked by my locker today and I could tell she was upset. I asked her what was wrong and apparently she got a new pencil and the electric sharpener ate like half of it. *sob* I used to deal with that drama all the time so now I use mechanical.

what really pissed me off was my stupid friend mark whos cat died and he was all whiney, as if that petty shit matters. Doesn't he know we all die in the end



todays poem:

why

do i

cry

everyday?

it's not

ok

so emo





I am too emo right now I need to go cry


-piece

jules vurne